I think your eyelids look fine, I doubt anyone would have noticed anything different without you mentioning it. If it's purely cosmetic (as in, it doesn't affect your life otherwise), surgery is probably overkill.
Honestly might just kill myself if this issue dont get revolved feel like anyone who disagrees and doesn't want to see me as good looking ain't fair I hate my life my eyelid fuck me over so much I look retarded I ain't
Um, it's nowhere near as bad as you make it sound, it looks normal. Though it sounds like you might be affected by body dysmorphic disorder, highly recommend that you seek out professional help instead of having those thoughts.